As a girl child it’s been thought to us from our childhood that you have to get marry one day and leave your parents, siblings, friends and house. I passed my school in 2004, I was an average student and my relatives think that I will do nothing but a usual graduation. So, the day I got my result, mom told me that I had a marriage proposal by a doctor guy. I refused at a first instant and they also supported me as I was too young. I passed my graduation in 2009 and again a new proposal from an engineer guy, working abroad and pulling in dollars. Now as, I am graduate the family pressure increases, still I manage to refuse and I said I wanted to do post graduation.
I thought the marriage thing is on hold for two years, but they keep on poking me for marriage . There is a time in my PG when every week I heard a news of someone got marry and these news came with the bash for my parents, that their daughter is also getting old. They arranged many meeting with different sort of guys in although either they refused me or I did the honors.
I m 27 now and still not ready to for THE marriage thing. But my friends, parents, relatives and society keep yelling on me that this is the right age to get marry otherwise you will be too old and you will have less options to dig in to. You are a girl and you can’t live alone, people will curse you for this and you can’t bear the mental pains, these are the tantrums they throw on me to convince me for MARRIAGE. I call it blackmailing on the name of society…….’kya kahenge log jawan ladki ko ghar mein baitha rakha hai…haww!!!’….Does it really bothering them??
Marriage means many different things according to the time and place of the culture and people involved. We assume that, ” love is pre condition for marriage but in Indian society marriage is pre-condition for love”…. ‘shadi kar lo pyar to apne aap ho jaega’. These pragmatic marriage issues started with the informal taunting and later with the societal, family or friend’s pressure to get marry.
My associates often utter that today we all are single but when we all get marry, I will be left alone as they have their personal everyday jobs to fulfill. They think “FEAR of being ALONE” leads me to marriage. I m not against marriage, just having a doubt about the life after marriage!!
This intensive pressure of getting marry is killing me from inside and I m losing my confidence. Someone well said, ”Society knows perfectly well how to kill a woman and has methods more subtle than death.” Is it really difficult for a woman to stand on her determination in this patriarchy society where everyone pushes you to get marry!!! Why can’t I be distinct???Every second girl confront the similar issues and get into the trap of legal relation without their will….because the fake FACT says; you cant live alone!! Are we really heading towards the better democracy where you consider woman on equality or we just fudge around when we debate about our country……